This article contains 3 written exercises that are designed to help clarify your own personal values. To get some background on what I mean by values, check out part one of this article here.
I highly suggest taking out a pen and paper to write these answers down. It is way more helpful then just going it over in your head. These exercises were created by psychotherapist Russ Harris’. To check out his ACT program click here.
Okay so you have your pen and paper, right?
10 Years Into the Future
I want you to imagine that we fast forward 10 years into the future. Finish the following sentences:
I spent too much time worrying about…
I did not spend enough time doing such things as…
If I could go back in time, what I’d do differently from today onwards is…
Your 80th Birthday
I want you to imagine that starting today, you lived your life exactly as you wanted to live it. Difficult thoughts and feelings did not get in your way and you behaved exactly as the person you truly wished to be. You treated yourself, others and the world the way you deep down wanted to treat them.
Now we fast forward to your 80th birthday, and someone very special to you gets up to make a speech about you. What would you most like to hear them say about…
The sort of person you were…
Your 3 greatest strengths and qualities…
The way you treated them…
Something that is painful today
Last scenario. I want you to pick out a situation you are struggling with today. Now let’s fast forward 1 year into the future and we are looking back on this situation. I want you to imagine you handled it in the best possible way, behaving like the person you deep down want to be. From this perspective…
What did you stand for in the face of this adversity? What values did you live by? For example, did you stand for courage, persistence, kindness, compassion, honesty, integrity?
How did you treat yourself as you dealt with this?
How did you treat others you care about?
Reflection
What did you find in these answers? Were there any values you could see in your responses? Try writing a list of what values came up.
If you are confused by what I mean by ‘values’, check out this list of common values here.